that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
