would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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