Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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