My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
