that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Im part way to drunk.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
