I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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