these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
