We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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