i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
