if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize
