Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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