Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
