I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I think my fart just growled at me.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
