He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
