dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
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