I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
