oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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