Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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