a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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