...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Quick, to the slutcave!
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
