My pussy is not your playground.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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