White coat. Heels.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
They took my balls.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
