Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
