its not stalking. its research.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
