is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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