i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
