why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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