And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
