You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
