And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
