i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
