I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
