So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
