Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
