Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
