I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Randomize
