Non-Jews are for practice
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
