do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
