Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Its about making memories worth repressing
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize