honey bunches of taint.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
