so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
He passed out mid-signature
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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