the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
