so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
