margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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