I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
we're making bets on your personal life
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
