Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
