is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
