I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
