I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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