i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
